Twitter I just don’t get. Fact is, the entire “social media” thing escapes me. It’s not media – there is no “news” involved – it’s just a bunch of people socializing…if you can even call it that.
I’m an old-school guy. I still read newspapers – what few there are – and have a landline phone. Sure, I can see how the Internet has evolved into the go-to news resource; up-to-the-nanosecond news is obviously better than the day-old stuff we get in print. Provided, of course, the news comes from reputable sources. Like CNN, not cndybear4359.
Just don’t see how Facebook and MySpace and texting and now this damn Twitter can be considered legit info sources. Spelling be damned, opinions trump facts, and sharing life’s little details is more important than actually living life.
Worst of all is Twitter, which, to me, is the sideshow of the traveling circus that is social media. You know, the tent with the tattooed bearded lady and three-headed goat that just creep you out.
I just don’t need to know what someone I have never met is doing right this moment…140 characters at a time. No one does. Yuck.
Wanna know what a Tweet is? Here are some actual Droppings, I mean Tweets, from some actual twits, I mean Twitterers. Or is it Tweeters?
squitiere: STOOPID ME i lock myself out of the bathroom
Turtle3D: Getting new tires at the local mexican tire shop. Why is this the perfect location for a photoshoot?…Or porn.
cuteloafers: Im sick of the things I do when Im nervous like cleaning the oven or checking my tires
Double yuck! And a two-hour shower.
According to the head Twits of Twitter, this is the new way for people to get news and vital information and marketing messages. Based on the hundreds of Tweets I’ve seen, our school system really is lame.
But you can’t pass judgment until you walk a mile in someone’s shoes, can you? So I decided to Tweet my way through an entire day just to see just how it works (and how pathetic one has to be to share so much meaningless information). Here goes:
Tmiguy: OMG. Big leg cramp woke me up. 3 am. Hey, what’s that crawling on the mirror?
Tmiguy: Posting that was a bad idea. Can’t get back to sleep. Crap!
Tmiguy: Double crap! Late to work. Fell asleep on couch. No alarm. Dogs no help…gotta shower and fly
Tmiguy: Man, fell asleep on the can. Need coffee real bad. Dammit…there’s that cramp again!
Tmiguy: Just passed a cop. Wait, I’m good…he turned. No, that was another car…
Tmiguy: OK, the day can start. $150 ticket and 300 e-mails. Maybe I’ll try tomorrow
Tmiguy: Can’t think of an idea for my column. Totally blocked. Any ideas out there? Anyone?
Tmiguy: Oooo…lunchtime. Looks like a ham sandwich. Yummy!
Tmiguy: Oh, god, what was that??? Tongue is burning! Not ham…crap…pimiento loaf! I need water
Tmiguy: Did you know I have like 2,000 rolodex cards?
Tmiguy: Sun is out. That’s nice. Probably should edit something.
Tmiguy: This medical benefit meeting sucks. Blah, blah, blah. Sounds like Charlie Brown’s teacher.
Tmiguy: Oops, she saw me. No eye contact. I’m cool. Still sounds shrill
Tmiguy: Did I turn off the coffee maker? Better call home.
Tmiguy: That cloud looks like a clown. Or a waffle with whipped cream. Huh?!
Tmiguy: Couldn’t find my pencil. Can you believe that? An editor w/o a pencil?
Tmiguy: Note to self…see if my house is on google earth
Tmiguy: Finally, get to go home. Note to self…write blog about twittering and post on facebook
Tmiguy: Just realized how stupid that sounds. LOL! Oh man, there’s another cop
Tmiguy: And he has the gall to remind me about this morning’s ticket? Should have stayed in bed
Tmiguy: IT’S THE ONE ON THE RIGHT LADY!!! Push it down or get out of my way
Tmiguy: Another note to self…write a blog about twittering about road rage and post on facebook
Tmiguy: Dinner…hot dogs and macaroni/cheese. Again. Feeling lazy. Again
Tmiguy: Why did my dog chase that deer?
Tmiguy: Cramping again. Tomorrow better be better.
Tmiguy: My thumbs hurt. Why?
